in your library, may I suggest you order it immediately? This book, Nourishing Traditions, has changed my life, it really has. How I look at food and what constitutes real food, and how to get as many nutrients our of our food has been revolutionized in my mind and heart. I thought the Hoxsey diet was great, but this takes Hoxsey's whole foods diet to a whole new level. This is done by taking a few steps back in time; to revisit--to relearn, the way our ancestors prepared and ate their food. This book just scratches the surface of what it means to be nourished, and how to really feed our bodies what they require to thrive. Have I sold you on it yet? Surely I have piqued your interest? I hope so!
Written by Heather Zubiate Dear reader, if you don't have this book by Sally Fallon in your library, may I suggest you order it immediately? This book, Nourishing Traditions, has changed my life, it really has. How I look at food and what constitutes real food, and how to get as many nutrients our of our food has been revolutionized in my mind and heart. I thought the Hoxsey diet was great, but this takes Hoxsey's whole foods diet to a whole new level. This is done by taking a few steps back in time; to revisit--to relearn, the way our ancestors prepared and ate their food. This book just scratches the surface of what it means to be nourished, and how to really feed our bodies what they require to thrive. Have I sold you on it yet? Surely I have piqued your interest? I hope so! It should go without saying that there is great importance in good nutrition, even our white coated denizens of pharmaceutical prescriptions can agree on that. Without question, our bodies require certain nutrients to help us grow from infancy into adolescence, puberty, and finally into adulthood. But how do we know what is really good to eat? Fortunately for us in this modern day and age, we are furnished with the food pyramid by our government, that has been scientifically proven (their opinion) to provide us with good nutrition, and by default, good health. I say this with tongue in cheek of course, because time has proven that this is not what happens. The American diet isn't called S.A.D. for nothing. As rich in food as this country is, we have an awful lot of health problems. This fact has not escaped the F.D.A's notice, so they have had to change their pyramid's ratios over the years as new nutritional evidence trickles in; more likely due to corporate lobbyist influence rather than any unbiased scientific information regarding our health. And then there is the frightening world of scientific grants given to anyone who can write a good paper, requesting one. Scientists with confirmation bias, that are then given huge grants are the people behind the construction of the food pyramid. Not a good formula to use if you want the unvarnished truth. So who are we to believe regarding nutrition? Our government that is influenced by egotistical scientists and corporate greed, or the wisdom of the people who came before us? My vote is our ancestors. I understand that no one person or organization has all of the answers to our health questions, and so we must glean information from the best fields. And what better field is there than the past? History is a good teacher, if we care to listen. In our modern day and age, truly, for every 5 doctors or scientists that claim something is good for you, there will be 5 who claim the opposite, and all 10 have scientific studies to back their claims. It can be rather confusing to say the least. Facts are paramount to making a good decision, but what happens when facts are incomplete or skewed in favor of profit? And then there is the controversial topic of anecdotal evidence, which is frowned upon by the medical industry. I find it rather ironic that it's okay for them to use it when gathering information for their studies. When someone asks, "How do you feel?" -- you have just entered the statistical world of anecdotal evidence. But when a natural remedy is used and a cure happens, then all of the sudden, anecdotal evidence is considered to be pure hooey, or the result of placebo. Any physical evidence, such as before and after tests are dismissed or claimed to be the result of misdiagnosis, or spontaneous healing. What about studies on natural remedies? Oh, I'm so sorry, but there isn't any corporate money to be had in studying them. This is where history comes into play. How did our ancestors live long enough to pass on their genes for generations? They must have done some things right -- right? Let us ask ourselves some questions, did they suffer from gluten, soy, and dairy sensitivities? If not, then why not? We have their genes inside us, why do we suffer these things? What has changed? I think this book answers these and many other such questions. For those doctors that thumb their noses at Dr. Price's work, if they are honest then they will have to put themselves under the same scrutiny, and I have a feeling that they won't come out smelling like a rose. I must have to say in all honesty that any "hole in one" approach to good health, including food, is automatically suspect, in my opinion. However, my focus here is on the facet of diet, or more specifically, good nutrition. Even so, as good as certain foods like kale, acai berries, fish, olive and coconut oils are, I realize that they aren't the single answer to all of our health problems. And philosophies for good health such as relying on a fist full of chemically derived supplements washed down with a diet soda pop or pot of decaffeinated coffee are flawed to say the least. Or the idea that burning the candle at both ends is offset with a good diet and exercise, isn't a good idea either. Eventually you're going to crash regardless of the amount of kale you eat and how many sit-ups you do. It takes a concert of good habits to be in play to achieve good health such as: cleanliness, diet, emotional well being, exercise, hydration, sleep, and spiritual well being. If any one of these sections are out of tune, then our health will be out of tune. But it is amazing to me just how much our diet effects not only our physiology, but our emotional and mental health as well, which to me, makes proper diet a much bigger slice of the proverbial whole health pie. It is up to every individual seeking knowledge to use a dash of wisdom and a pinch of common sense to sift through all of the conflicting information out there to determine if a health claim is substantiated, conjecture, or fabrication. It is my opinion that this book helps clarify what good nutrition is, and how to get it. If you are on the Hoxsey protocol, the only thing to watch our for in the recipes found in Nourishing Traditions is of course, the four foods that neutralize the tonic, which are: alcohol, pork, tomatoes, and vinegar i.e. acetic acid. Other recipes and ingredients may not suit those with allergies, sensitivities, or hormone issues related to dairy and other foods like soy. The main thing I have taken away from this book is how to prepare foods to make them more nutritious. Foods like grains, legumes, nuts, and seeds definitely need to be either soaked, sprouted, or soured to make the nutrients they contain more bio-available to our bodies. Any recipes that have the "forbidden four" can be used by applying permitted substitutions. For example, if a salad dressing calls for any type of vinegar, then simply substitute it with any fresh citrus juice. The health information peppered through out the book is also very interesting. I also highly recommend stopping by the official Weston A. Price Foundation website, www.westonaprice.org for even more up to date nutritional information, resources, recipes, and other related health topics. While I don't agree with every health claim in the book, e.g. the supreme role of enzymes play in our health, I do agree that our diet has gone too far toward being convenience oriented. Most "fast food" isn't good for us, be they whole foods, or the pseudo-foods dished out in seconds by the denizens of fry cookery. This book sheds some much needed light on at least one facet of good health by how to properly prepare foods based on the tried and true wisdom of our ancestors. For example, the proper way to prepare grains for consumption. Could improper preparation be the reason so many people are suffering from digestive issues? I think that is a big piece to the indigestion puzzle. I have experienced it myself. I would burp quite a bit after eating conventionally prepared bread. But bread made from my sourdough starter doesn't give me a bad case of the burps or a tummy ache. Raw milk and cheeses don't bother me. Brown rice that is pre-soaked and then cooked in saturated fat is more satisfying and delicious than following the package instructions. And so, it is my hope that you will check this book out and put some, if not all of of the tried and true methods our ancestors used to obtain good nutrition and health from whole foods, into practice.
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Written by Heather Zubiate few days ago, I was asked by a reader about my Hoxsey solution to pickle relish. If you are not familiar with the Hoxsey diet for curing cancer, while on the tonic, we are not allowed to have vinegar. That is a problem if you want pickles, because most commercial made pickles are made with vinegar - and salt -- lots of salt! No wonder I LOVE them! For the Hoxsey cure dieter, this is indeed quite a pickle -- ha ha! The solution to this problem is in the brine. By using a fresh pickling method (a.k.a. refrigerator pickles) any sour citrus, such as lemon, lime, or even sour orange juice can be substituted for the offending vinegar! What about the salt? Because it is a fresh pickle, or a refrigerator pickle, not as much salt (even no salt) is needed as in a traditional vinegar hot processed, or even in a natural fermented pickle. The salt is needed in those methods to preserve the veggies from bad bacteria. In the case of a fresh citrus pickle, refrigeration is what keeps the bacterial nasties at bay. The FDA recommends consuming these fresh pickles within three days of making them, because of the way these pickles are processed, low or no salt, and no heat. This also works in our favor as this is not enough time to produce any trace amounts of carbonation, alcohol, or vinegar that would be produced in a traditional fermentation process, which are also on our list of "no-nos". This is indeed good news for the Hoxsey patient! Types of VeggiesYou can pickle any of the traditional veggies from cukes, cauliflower, carrots, green beans, and onions, to the not so traditional like whole cherry tomatoes. Eh--we on the Hoxsey diet can't have tomatoes, so scratch that off the list, sorry folks. The thing with fresh pickling is that the veggies must --well, be fresh, and have to be cut into smallish pieces or slices so the citrus juice can quickly pickle the veggies and remain fresh until consumption within the three day window allotted by the FDA for food safety. The FlavoringsIf you have ever done any pickling, or you are a pickle connoisseur, then you will know what spices are used in traditional pickles. Mustard and dill seed, red chili flakes, garlic, and peppercorns. But don't let that dictate what you use in your fresh citrus pickle! Any herb, seed, or spice can be used, which opens up the glass ceiling of flavors to new heights! Try different herbs and spices together to get different flavor profiles. French flavors would include fennel or tarragon, rosemary, lavender, marjoram, thyme, and black pepper. Italian flavors would include fennel, sage, oregano, basil, thyme, garlic, hot pepper, etc. Experimentation is the spice of life, so get creative! Sweet or Savory?As for having a sweet pickle, the Hoxsey diet does allow us to use certain sweeteners sparingly. They can be used for those who like a sweet relish on their favorite organic beef or poultry based sausage, hot dog, or burger. I prefer my veggie pickle to be savory -- salty, really. I realize that the Hoxsey diet severely -- severely!! --limits salt, but I still use 1 Tbsp. of salt in my pickle. I believe that salt is an important mineral, and medical evidence suggests that too little salt is just as bad as too much. And each individual requires different amounts. My husband rarely craves salt, while I crave it at certain times of the month -- like everyday. The 1 Tbsp. of salt allows me to keep the fresh pickle longer than 3 days, but no longer than a week just to be safe. The veggies don't absorb all the salt (or else the brine would not remain salty), but I still use the veggie pickle sparingly, it's a condiment after all, and not a meal. Even so, those who are better at limiting their salt intake than I am, the fresh pickle is a great way to get some much needed pucker power into your flavor repertoire without all the sodium of regular pickles and relishes -- or the vinegar. The Juice. Choose Your Citrus!
tree in my garden, it is slightly less acidic than the Eureka lemon that is found in most grocery stores, because it is a hybrid between a lemon and a mandarin orange. However, I have found that a newly ripened Meyer lemon is more tart than a mature fruit. Either way, the juice is still pretty tart thanks to the citric acid, but not as tart as a lime or Eureka lemon. I don't think grapefruit would make a good juice to pickle veggies, as it is quite bitter. But if you want to try it, I suggest a very small test batch. Fresh Citrus Pickle RecipesThere is a myriad of fresh citrus pickle recipes available at our finder tips thanks to the world wide web if you need help getting started creating a fresh citrus pickle! I will give you my very basic recipe that I use to pickle onions, which I use on my favorite salad and to grace my occasional organic grass-fed beef hot dog. Feel free to add your own herbs and spices! Remember that you can use any vegetable (except potatoes, they don't seem to be a good veggie to pickle) as long as it is fresh, clean, and sliced thinly, or cut into small dice for relish to allow for quick pickling. So this is one more condiment that is back on the menu! Bon Appetit! More articles to consider...
Written by Heather Zubate he Hoxsey diet is basically a whole foods diet, and as cancer diets go, I have found it pretty easy to follow. Others who are on this diet may not agree, but for those of us who have been on any strict diet for various reasons know first hand just how hard it is to change the way you eat, but when it comes to saving your life, it's not too much to ask, really. Unfortunately, there are two items* that render the Hoxsey tonic powerless and they are tomatoes (including tomatillos), and vinegar (i.e. acetic acid). Why? I don't know, and the doctors at the Hoxsey clinic don't really know why either. All the same, that doesn't seem too bad until you realize that these items, especially vinegar, are in a lot of products on grocery store shelves, and I happen to like eating tomatoes and vinegar-- a lot! So, if you are on this diet, then you will have to become an avid and careful label reader, with a PhD in chemical names, if you aren't already, to make sure you won't consume any forbidden ingredients. But really, any processed foods, even those that are considered to be "healthy' should be severely limited as they are, well, commercially processed. Some organic soups, like chicken noodle for instance, have tomato in them! Even though it's next to the last ingredient on a very long list, it is STILL FORBIDDEN! UPDATE*There are actually two more food stuffs that render the tonic inert -- pork and alcohol. Again, as diets go, the Hoxsey diet is really easy to follow, and more importantly, easy to stick to compared to a raw vegan diet like the Gersson Therapy diet. If you're addicted to drinking coffee ( instead of using it for enemas as on the Gersson therapy), the option for you is to use organic decaf, but it has to be decaffeinated without chemicals. So the starting forbidden food tally is no: coffee, alcohol, tomatoes, vinegar, pork products, highly processed and fried foods, salt and the most addictive thing of all, refined white flour and sugars. These food stuffs are NOT on the Hoxsey menu. Oh boy, I think I just listed the diet of the American South right there. Amazingly, as far as sugar goes, I can do without sugar for the most part, but salt? NEVER! Unfortunately the Hoxsey diet restricts salt to is a minuscule 1/2 tsp. per day. Per DAY! That's inhumane for a saltoholic! A salt fiend! A salt vampire! And so, I've decided to toss that prescription out the proverbial window. I personally feel that the severe salt restriction is as archaic and wrong as the claim that animal fats give you high cholesterol. But science backs me up on this, I've read many scientific articles that say too little salt is as bad as too much. I've always felt that I needed more salt than the average person. The only exception would be if I had high blood pressure, which I don't. Even so, I have limited my salt intake quite a bit from my usual consumption, which I assure you, was a lot! And because of that limitation, things are so much more salty to me. This is my one real cheat, and I think it's a justifiably better than cheating with refined sugars. Speaking of cheating, eh hem... Cheating? Moi? Okay, okay, now and then I cheat with a few of the "sugar" fruits like pineapples and mangoes. And I indulge in the rare lick of the knife that cut a piece of chocolate cake for my boys, but that's it. Okay, so I had a big spoonful of mac-n-cheese when no one was looking. In my defense, I've heard that some people on the diet cheated with a weekly doughnut, which I heard Dr. Guetierrez wasn't too thrilled about. Why Hoxsey?The reason I'm on the Hoxsey diet and tonic is that I was diagnosed with un-staged papillary thyroid cancer in May of 2016; un-staged due to certain factors regarding my age and what not. I mean why were my doctors being so coy? The cancer left my thyroid and was stopped by a lymph node in my neck. Stage 3? Stage 4? Anyway, I've looked into other diets, but they seemed too drastic (and in my case, I'm not that bad off), or the diets weren't balanced. I feel that this diet and treatment suited me the best. And I think the therapy is going well, except for digestive issues that are not related to the therapy, since I've had them off and on for decades. I have been on the Hoxsey diet and tonic for a little over 6 months and I have lost at least 25 lbs. I haven't really weighed myself since I started 6 months ago at 222 lbs., because I don't own a scale; my gauge has been my clothes, which fit a lot more loosely these days, thank you very much! I was supposed to be journaling about my journey since that time, but --yeah--I didn't. Sorry. This diet can be challenging as you need to relearn how to cook. I'm a good cook, if I do say so myself, but like I said, this diet is daunting with all it's restrictions, even more so for the semi-homemade cook, or the take out types. Fortunately, there's a really beautiful cookbook by the Sassy Chef, Alison Taafe, whose sister Laura, was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2007, and again in 2010, and finally beat it with the Hoxsey tonic, and diet! You can read about their amazing journey toward health and healing here. I have been meaning to order a copy of Taafe's book (called 'Eat For Your Life') for the last 6 months. And I could kick myself for not doing it, because it was a struggle for me in the beginning to figure out what to eat, it was kinda depressing. So, I would highly recommend getting this book to save you from any anxiety, if you have cancer, and have been though the ringer, the less stress the better! I think they even sell it at the clinic in Mexico. Hoxsey Diet List of FoodsThe goal of detoxification is to open the routes of elimination in order to remove toxins from the body. This process is greatly facilitated by a wholesome diet with plenty of water along with the herbal and nutritional supplements prescribed. Your diet should be centered on whole low sugar fruits, vegetables (organic and GMO free as much as possible), fresh herbs, antibiotic and hormone free meats and dairy. No (highly) processed foods, refined white flours, or sugars, artificial flavoring, colors, or preservatives are to be consumed. These foods are void of good nutrition, contain toxins that burden your body by interfering with your treatment and prohibit healing, and are of course, cancer causing. All microwave cooking or reheating is prohibited while on the Hoxsey Treatment! Also, non-stick type cookware should not be used, as it is known to contribute to cancer. No aluminum pots or pans as they can react with certain foods and cause toxicity. Only stainless steel, cast iron, glass, or lead free ceramic pots and pans are deemed safe to use, as they do not impart any toxins, or cause any unsafe chemical reactions with food. As for what is considered to be approved foods, and unapproved foods that are on the Hoxsey diet, here's the list: Foods That Are Permitted:Beverages-Drink 2 quarts of liquids per day: Freshly squeezed fruit (avoid if diabetic) Veggie juices (except tomato) Grape Juice (white, or dark grapes diluted with equal amount of water) fresh is better. (Avoid if diabetic.) Low Fat Milk- Cow or goat in glass bottle or a paper carton. (organic and raw if possible.) Buttermilk – in a glass bottle or a paper carton. (organic and raw if possible.) Filtered Water – avoid plastic bottles if possible. Non-Caffeinated Herbal Teas (organic if possible.) Decaf Coffee- natural water decaffeination process Cereals - Made without sugar, or preservatives, and organic, or at least non GMO Grains- Amaranth, Barley, Brown rice, Buckwheat, Corn (organic, non GMO air popped), Einkorn Wheat, Kamut, Oats, Rye, Spelt Condiments- Nama Shoyu Soy Sauce, Cheeses*- Only Fresh Unaged Cheeses: Chevre, Cottage cheese, Feta, Mascarpone, Quark, Queso fresco, Ricotta, Yogurt Cheese (a.k.a. Kefir, & Labne) *low sodium if possible, or no other salt for the day consumed Eggs- 3 to 6 eggs per week (organic/free range/ no soy if possible) Fats/Oils- Cold pressed oils: Almond, Flax Seed, Grape Seed, Olive, Sesame, walnut etc. (avoid canola and other liquid or solid vegetable oils as they are highly processed) Saturated fats: butter from grass fed beef (unsalted if possible), coconut, duck fat from free organic range ducks, tallow from grass fed cows. Fish* - Fresh ocean caught: Anchovies, Butterfish, Catfish, Clam, Crab (Domestic), Croaker (Atlantic), Flounder, Haddock (Atlantic), Hake, Herring, Mackerel (N. Atlantic, Chub), Mullet, Oyster, Perch (Ocean), Plaice, Pollock, Salmon (Canned), Salmon (Fresh), Sardines, Scallops, Shad (American), Shrimp, Sole (Pacific), Squid (Calamari), Tilapia, Whitefish, Whiting (all the lowest Mercury level fish/seafood) Fresh water caught: Bass, Catfish, Crawfish/Crayfish, Pike, Trout (Freshwater), Salmon, Walleye - *any fish consume 2 x per week Fruits- Low sugar fruits are preferable such as: Apples, Avocados, Berries, Citrus, and Figs, Guavas, Kiwis, Melons (like cantaloupe, and casaba), Nectarines, Papayas, Peaches, Plums, and Sour Cherries Organic, no sugar added dried fruits are permitted, but limit consumption as they are higher in sugar than fresh fruits (no sulfides). Herbs- Fresh or Dried: Basil, Bay leaf (Laurel), Cayenne pepper, Chili powder, Chives, Cilantro, Curry, Dill, Fennel, Garlic, Ginger root, Ground mustard, Lemon balm, Lemon verbena, Marjoram, Mint, Oregano, Parsley, Paprika, Rosemary, Saffron, Sage, Tarragon, Thyme Spices: Allspice, Caraway, Cardamom, Cinnamon, Cloves, Coriander, Cumin, Curry, Fennel, Fenugreek, Ginger (ground), Juniper, Kelp (salt replacement)*, Mace, Nutmeg, Pepper, Turmeric, Sea salt*, Star Anise *only use sea salt or Kelp (only ½ tsp. daily) sprinkled directly on food to help with blandness. Legumes- Black beans, Garbanzo beans, Kidney beans, Lentils, Lima beans, Pinto beans, Soy beans, Meats- Free range poultry (chicken, turkey, duck) - 1 x per week Grass fed beef and lamb - 1x per week Wild game: Buffalo, Caribou, Deer (Venison), Elk, Moose, Quail, Rabbit - 1x per week Instead of beef. Nuts/ All unsalted nuts and nut butters (except peanuts/peanut butter). Pastas- Whole wheat (ancient varieties such as Einkorn), or gluten free, and that don’t contain vinegar (acetic acid). Seeds - Chia, Flax, Hemp, Pumpkin, Sesame, Sunflower, Wild rice Sugars- Natural sugars: Honey, Molasses, Raw Sugar, Real Maple, Sucanat, Stevia, Syrup, Turbanado, Xylitol. (Exercise restraint) Veggies All fresh and organic. Root vegetables (exercise restraint if diabetic) Foods That Are Not AllowedBeverages*- Carbonated drinks with caffeine, refined sugars, and with artificial sweeteners, flavorings, and colors. Sweet fruit juices such as pineapple and straight grape juices. Caffeinated coffee and black teas. No Tomato based veggie juices! *I thought I read somewhere no alcoholic beverages either. Condiments- Anything with Tomato or Vinegar (acetic acid) is not allowed: Ketchup, Mayonnaise, Mustard, Pickles and Relishes, Steak sauces, Vinegar (acetic acid), Worcestershire Deep fried foods – Avoid All Deep Fried Foods!!! Fats/Oils- Liquid or Solid hydrogenated vegetable oils. They are highly processed, and turn rancid quickly. Such as Shortening, Canola, Safflower, and Corn etc. Fruits- Any dried fruits with added sugar, or sulfides. Fresh: Grapes, Mangos, Pineapples, Tomatoes, and Tomatillos Grains- White flours and rice, and GMO’s Meats- Deli meats (high in sodium and other chemicals) Hormone or antibiotic fed animals. Any and all pork Salt water fish high in mercury such as the large predatory fish: Northern Pike, Orange Roughy, Mackerel, Marlin, Shark, Swordfish, Tilefish, and many Tuna (the smaller skipjack is lower in mercury than the larger albacore.) Farmed raised fish, either fresh water or ocean fish. Nuts/Seeds- Peanuts (prone to aflatoxins) and peanut butter Sugars- highly processed: agave nectar, corn syrups, brown sugar, and white sugar artificial sweeteners: Equal, NutraSweet, Saccharine, Splenda, Sweet n low Again, no foods with artificial colors, flavors, or preservatives! You'd be surprised by how many "health foods" contain that stuff! Especially the dreaded MSG, which food manufactures try to pass off as innocent sounding additives such as "natural flavorings", "flavorings, "seasonings, or textured protein, citric acid, hydrolyzed protein, (get your chemistry dictionaries out) calcium caseinate, and sodium caseinate. I'm going back for my 6 month check up in a week, and I'm hoping to hear good news, Lord willing, I will be cancer free! I've been feeling so much better lately, I have a lot more energy than I have had in years! If I still have cancer, well then, I will give it another 6 months and get really strict on my diet, and I may even throw in some exercise! Related Articles You May Enjoy
Mmmm! Will you just look at all that delicious, wholesome looking food? Lately, I've been researching the homesteading trend, and applying what I can on our limited budget and space, and that leads into many other avenues. Each fascinating path of homesteading has its own learning curve, and that means gobs and gobs of information to digest. In particular, recently I have fixated on the whole reason for farming.... FOOD! Dear reader, surely, you have heard someone say... Right? Well? Do you believe that, dear reader? Do you think that this saying is really true, or is it just some flimflam hype that only sounds good, but is really a load of bunk? Well, I believe it's true. I do. I mean, if the body needs certain nutrients to carry out its functions properly, and we get those nutrients through our food, then it can be said that what we eat does become part of us. And so, in a sense, we are what we eat. As far as I'm concerned, it's like the rat said," If you are what you eat, then I only want the good stuff!" Now the tricky question is: "What do you consider to be the good stuff?" [Duh, duh, duh!] I know. This seemingly simple question opens up a HUGE can of those proverbial worms, and boy are they squirmy! Dear reader let me tell ya that I have nearly gone crazy, loopy, bonkers, and yes, coo-coo for cocoa puffs, just trying to sort out all the information, misinformation, and disinformation out there littering the Inter/web concerning this very important topic! It's enough to give me ...well....information constipation! I wonder if the cure for this situation is eating dirt. No? Because ya know, after reading all those quotes and factoids from doctors and nutritional 'experts' on such and such study, after study, all of which pretty much make you feel like everything from birth to death is BAD for you, it makes me want to go outside and scooping up a big ol' heaping hand full of the brown earthy stuff and..... No, eating dirt can't be the answer. The only cure for information constipation, I think, seems to be a healthy does of level headed common sense. Well, that and the stuff I learned in seventh grade science class regarding the digestive system. I might touch on that in other articles. I know...you can hardly wait, right? At any rate, there was a time when those who came before us didn't sit around and discuss whether or not grains, meats, dairy, or fats were healthy , or unhealthy for them to eat. Most of our ancestors didn't know squat about vitamins, minerals, saturated fats, or fatty acids. To our forefathers, grains, wild game, domesticated meat, dairy, and fat were considered to be "the good stuff." But that isn't the case now, is it? If you ask me, I think there are far too many experts who are throwing their two cents into the deep pool of dietary requirements, and muddying it considerably in the process. It makes me wonder what our ancestors would think of all this hog wash. Ancestral Foods?Speaking of our ancestors, one of the latest diet crazes is the rallying cry to take a step back in time and eat ancestral foods. What does that mean? Well, simply put, ancestral foods are the foods that our ancestors ate. Seems simple enough, right? Wrong! Because "ancestral" also goes by many other hip buzz words like paleo, primal, and any other archaeological classification that can be used to describe evolutionary man. And as if that isn't enough to keep your search engine purring all hours of the day, the consensus on this new fad diet are, of course, all over the nutritional map. Experts, and bloggers have drawn lines in the shifting sands of our nutritional health by using their expert opinions with their own factoids and reasons for embracing it, or holding it at arms length. Which leaves most of us in a pile of confusion, or with a bad case of information constipation. After reading some stuff on this current fad, it seems odd to me that the Paleo diet people seem to think that big game animals don't have ANY FAT on them. While it is certainly true that wild animals are leaner than domesticated animals, yet, as I understand it, bear fat is something most hunters prize and crave. According to Alaskan subsistence homesteaders, moose fat is the bomb for baking. Has this changed in a few thousand years? I doubt it. Recently, I learned from another Alaskan homesteader that the ocular fatty globs found in the skulls of caribou are to them, like candy to a baby. My husband lived in Alaska as a boy, and these days you can't turn on the boobtube without at least seeing 10 shows having to do with our 49th state. Anyway, wouldn't it then stand to reason that ancient people would have rejoiced in the consumption of saturated fat, and certainly wouldn't have minded if they were able to get their stubby hands on more of it? I think so. Then there is the insistence that gluten grains were not on the paleo people's menu, but seeds were. Huh? I thought grains were in fact SEEDS. Ever hear of SEED corn? Wheat is indeed a type of grass that often propagates itself with, get this, SEEDS! This is nothing but a prime example of modern categorization techniques gone amuck to bring about confusion. And sorry folks, but according to the experts, besides gluten laden grains (a.k.a. seeds) and fat, apparently the neanderthals didn't fancy dairy, legumes, or bacon either. Wha??? They didn't have bacon?! Trust me dear reader, if they had the cranial savvy to invented bacon, then it would have been at the top of their menu! Isn't that right all of you undercover bacon eating vegans? And so, I think all of these new fad buzz word diets are just ridiculous. But without buzz words and 'experts' telling us what we should and shouldn't put in our mouths, then where would we be? Sane? Full? Healthy? Yeah, I think so. Anyway, the premise of this diet is that unlike today's convenience driven, highly processed, mad-science tainted foods we consume, our ancestors ate what ever they could get their hairy knuckle dragging hands on. That is to say, in the areas where they lived. Admittedly, I have yet to hear of anyone having found a record of highly perishable food stuffs being traded thousands of miles away form their source before the advent of refrigeration. However, shipping seeds and plants over great distances is another matter. So now, I wonder ... how did our cold climate ancestors get all the nutrients they needed if they didn't have access to the benefits of warm climate produce, like oranges? Didn't we learn in school about the sailors that got scurvy from the lack of vitamin c in their meager diets? And come to think of it, how did our warm climate ancestors ever get their fat soluble vitamins and omegas without the northern peoples staple, cod liver oil? Apparently you can get vitamin C from a lot of other sources than just oranges! If you want to look into why the Inuit people never got scurvy, even though they never had citrus, that'll blow your mind. As for the fat soluble vitamins A, D, E, and K, did you know that they all come from many other sources, not just from cod livers? My point is that in every nation and tribe, they seem to be able to eat a diet that works for them, and provides them with all the necessary nutrients they need to survive and thrive. This leads to the question as to what these kinds of fads do to local economies that depend on their local food resources. With all the hype about being "environmentally responsible", the economic plundering of other cultures' local food stuffs, just to satisfy Americans ignorant vanity, is hardly what I would call "responsible." For example: chia seeds. This widely touted "super food" is a staple of many Central and South American cultures. Well, not anymore, thanks to those who are out to make a fast buck on the latest health craze. Now the local people who have relied on this staple for thousands of years either have to go without, or they have to pay premium prices. And because the demand is greater than the supply, guess what? Quality control is becoming a big problem. Now instead of getting premium chia seeds, many health nuts are complaining that they are getting a lot of sticks and other natural debris in their expensive bags of life giving seeds. Poor babies. To meet American demand, others are now raising these seeds outside of its indigenous areas. So does this effect their nutritional content? What about the issue of chia becoming an invasive, or noxious weed in some places where they are introduced? Dear reader, do I need to say that the love of money drives these kinds of fads, and nothing more? Another thing I've also noticed is that when western methods of processing food are adopted, that is when a people's dietary troubles usually begin. Anyone remember beriberi being a problem in Asian nations before western milled white rice hit their markets? It can't be stressed enough, the love of money is truly the root of all evil. Trying To Eat Like It's 1869, In 2014Ah that golden year ... 1869! You see dear reader, that was the last time our forefathers would see stone ground wheat as being the norm. The very next year, high efficiency steel rollers replaced old fashioned granite milling stones. And that was only the beginning of the down hill nutritional avalanche history would record. The avalanche we are riding had rolled us into our current state of being a heavily malnourished, yet overweight society and it only took 150 years. One must wonder: What does the future hold for our food stuffs? And I do wonder. Because if big business has anything to say about it, one day we will all be putting pills into machines, pressing a button and *poof *! Whole meals a'la Willy Wonka, will be the norm. [blank stare] I'll bet that idea warms the cockles of every food chemist's heart, but it makes my blood run cold. I hope I don't live to see that horrific day. You know what I wish? I wish that going back in time was as easy as getting into a stainless steel sports car with a nifty flux capacitor attached to it. Then after putting the petal to the metal to reach a speed of 88 mph; the past would be my mercury free oyster. [dreamy sigh] Then I could shop for real wheat flour and other wholesome goodies that haven't been tainted by the wonders of modern science. How ironic, no? I would need modern science to help me escape from modern science...get it? Well, since this scifi fantasy isn't going to EVER happen, that means I need a better and more "real world" plan for 2014. Yes, there is no doubt that our foods have been reinvented by MR. Wizard types in white lab coats, but these folks aren't necessarily evil, I mean, they just want to earn a pay check while doing something they love to do, which is to do a lot of math and play with chemicals, that help give perishable food eternal life. Anyway, in order for me to provide my family with the best nutrient dense food I can afford, I do have some options, and some are more doable than others. The Options:
- what medical expenses to keep the animal(s) healthy until slaughter will be required. - the amount and kinds of food required to bring the animal(s) to the desired level of weight for slaughter. - who is going to butcher the animal(s) when the time comes? How much will it cost to pay someone else to do it? - how much and what kind of storage you need for the butchered meat, and an ongoing plan for replenishment of stocks. All of these are important things to consider, if you want to raise your own animals for food. ASSESSMENT: Doable to a very limited scale. I have no desire to butcher my own animals, and I could only raise chickens and rabbits for food on my land. I don't have enough room or money to raise larger animals. 4. Buy grass fed animal products. [$Cha-ching!$] This option is way out of my reach! I simply can't afford $10/lb. for grass fed beef. Neither can I justify paying upwards of $4/lb. for grass fed, or free range chicken. ASSESSMENT: Even if I used every scrap of the bones and skin, this route would quickly bankrupt my family. I suppose I could splurge every once and a while, but they very idea of paying those prices would dampen any potential joy in knowing it's healthy. If my men had to between watching their favorite ESPN type shows on satellite t.v. ($80/month) or eating grass fed beef, guess which one they would pick. Even then, that extra $80 wouldn't even come close to covering the $700 - $800/month meat bill that would be required for us to be Paleo carnivores. And I haven't even gotten to the maddening quandary of eating modern grains, dairy products, and fats. Have you got another 4 or 5 hours? I don't. There's dishes to be done, laundry to fold, and toilets to scrub. I may even throw caution to the wind and dare to bake a completely unhealthy apple pie. Life is short, so I might as well make it worth living. Besides, I consider a genuine made from scratch apply pie to be "the good stuff." Sure, it's loaded with sugar and fat, but it's gotta be better than what Hostess and Mrs. Smith cranks out. My ConclusionI believe that this world does need its experts, but a real expert realizes that the more he learns, the more he learns how little he really knows. Ya know? And now that I know what I know from those in the know regarding food and nutrition, I'll just do the best I can with what I have, like my ancestors before me did, and not sweat the stuff I can't control. I'll just have to put my faith in God's ability to bless the food I can afford to feed my family. Whew! What a sweet relief!
I'm on a mission to obtain a good recipe for panettone. Maybe it is because the first time I tried this epicurean delight was when my mom bought some and we shared it, and so by making my own, it would be a way of remembering her. Dear reader, I must ask you, have you ever experienced the lofty yumminess of this Italian bread? If you have, then you know what I'm talking about--right? As I savored my first bite I thought to myself, "Where have you been all my life?" Unlike the neutron star denseness of other European style fruitcakes, panettone is a deeply golden brown crusted, high domed loaf that holds little jewels of dried and candied fruit suspended inside its light and airy tangles of lightly sweet, golden lacy crumb, but wait....hold the phone! Did you know that there are two different versions of this Italian sweet bread? Yes, it is true...one comes to us from Genoa, and the other version is from Milan, a reality which can result in some confusion, as you can well imagine. Unfortunately, there are some recipes out there that just say "panettone" on them, without making any distinction, which can result in much disappointment for the baker. And to add to the confusion, there are also recipes out there from people who mix up the nomenclature (on purpose, or by mistake) and label their recipe a "Genovese Panettone," when it should be a Milanese or vice versa (grrrr!). And I have also found a kind of false advertising where some recipes have the quick bread type recipe which they try to pass off as authentic Genovese, that are attached with a picture of the tall Milanese type. I hate that kinda stuff, I mean really, not to be mean, but get it right people! Milanese Vs. GenoveseAs far as I can tell from the many sites I read from, the version from Milan is the tall molded one we all associate as being "panettone", thanks to the Italian baker Angelo Motta, and his three long rises technique. The short squatty free form round loaf is from Genoa. Now even more confusion can set in as to the leaveners used in these breads. Of course, without question, the Milanese version is a yeast dough, but I have seen recipes for the Genovese version that have baking powder, baking soda, and even ones with the traditional yeast leavener. The things that really make these two version distinct, are that the Milanese version is supposed to be tall, light and stretchy, while the Genovese version is supposed to be squatty, dense and crumbly. The good thing about this panettone duality is that if you are trying to make the Milanese version, but it doesn't turn out, no worries, just say that you have made the Genovese version! For now, I will be concentrating on finding a good recipe for the Milanese panettone. This version seems to be a little bit more versatile, meaning that you can make bread pudding or french toast from any left overs you might have. As for any Genovese panettone remnants, if you ask me, I think it is half-way to biscotti. Anyway, continuing on with Mission Panettone, since this delicious bread is traditionally produced during winter festivals, and is no longer readily available in stores, I looked up some recipes to see if I dare make one myself, out of "season." So I turned to the two baking websites that I enjoy the most, for a reliable recipe and they are www.joyofbaking.com and www.browneyedbaker.com. Both the ladies on these blogs never disappoint me with their fabulous recipes, and fortunately I found a Milanese panettone recipe on Brown Eyed Baker, since Michelle is of Italian heritage, I'm not surprised, and did she ever make a beauty, and on her first try too! Through research (more than I really expected to do) Michelle from Brown Eyed Baker, discovered a slow rise recipe created by Jim Lahey from Sullivan Street Bakery, proponent of the no knead bread revolution, and Michelle also used some helpful tips from Andrea Meyers, another baking blogger, to bake her first panettone. So naturally, I had to look at Andrea's panettone on her website, and to be honest, Michelle's panettone on the left looks like it has a much lighter and lacier crumb, while Andrea's on the right looks more dense, like a Genovese panettone. How can this be? They used the same recipe and the same method, so what gives? Well, as any baker knows, bread is a living thing until it is baked, and it can be highly temperamental. To rise quickly, bread dough likes warmth and humidity to grow to lofty proportions, well the yeast in the dough does anyway, but it can also do the same thing on a slower scale, more on that later. And so, I can tell from the pictures on these websites, that their finished product has to do with the rise factor, which occurs both during the initial pre-bake rise, and in the first few moments the loaf is in the oven. Yes, bread will actually grow quite a bit larger in the hot oven, before its outer crust finally succumbs to your ovens heat and its gluten network, or its crumb, is set. So, a humid oven actually helps a loaf to rise a bit more in the first few minutes it is in the oven, because the outside crust won't set as fast as it does in a "dry" oven. But that isn't the only factor to consider. Patience Is A Virtue...And Produces Great Panettone!"I hate waiting." - Inigo Mentoya, 'The Princess Bride' Yes, like Inigo Mentoya, I hate waiting, but a slow rising dough develops more flavor than a quick rising dough. And so, making these types of yeast breads requires quite a rather large chunk of time, planning, and - gasp - patience! Did you know that in the world of yeast dough, there are really two kinds: light and heavy? Light yeast dough, like pizza dough, doesn't have a lot of fat, or sugar in it, so it usually rises quickly, while heavy yeast dough containing quite a bit of fat, and sugar, will always need more time to rise due to their heft, sometimes two to four times longer than a light yeast dough. This is where the that darn patience part of the recipe comes into play. However, you can slow down the rise of light yeast dough (or any yeast dough really) by refrigerating it, and that is what gives it that wonderful fermented taste, because, remember, a slow rise equals more flavor! The RecipeThe recipe I'm going to share here is one I got from Food Network, that is the one I started with. I will be using Jim Lahey's recipe at a later date, after I'm done eating the first batch. For my first attempt at panettone, it seemed to work fine, although I could have let it rise more, but I'm getting ahead of myself, first things first...the recipe. Holiday Panettone Ingredient List 1/2 cup diced candied orange peel 3/4 cup dried cherries 3/4 cup golden raisins 3/4 cup diced dried apricots 1/2 cup sugar 1 tablespoon active dry yeast 3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour 1 1/4 teaspoons salt 1 cup whole milk, 1 stick butter, 1/4 c. honey 2 Tbsp. grated lemon zest 2 eggs (lightly beaten) 1 tsp. vanilla extract
I greedily slathered on some butter and watched hungrily as it melted into the lacy crumb, but the texture could have been a bit better if I had let it rise longer. As I devoured my first slice (there were more to follow) and it tasted very good regardless of the poor rise, and was surprisingly light considering I could have let it rise a few more hours. As for the recipe, the only complaint I have with it is the rise times they give, well, they just aren't realistic. Well, that concludes the first part of Mission Panettone, and I'm sorry I don't have any pictures to share, but I didn't have the patience to take them while making the dough, so on my next mission, I will be sure to take some pics. I think my mum would have been proud of my first attempt at making this delicious sweet bread. Until the sequel to Mission Panettone, happy baking!
Another year has flown by, and Thanksgiving has come and gone once more! I meant to post an article weeks ago, about how this is my favorite holiday, and why, but as always, time just seems to speedily fly away from me. I hope you and your family spent a blessed time together feasting on delicious fare, lovingly prepared. We had a nice time and the food was really good as usual, even though I realize that the turkey was not particularly juicy, but its smokey flavor more than made up for the lack of moisture, besides, that is what gravy is for right? Let Us Give ThanksAnyway, all my fussing about time and turkey aside, I must admit that this is the only nationally sanctioned holiday, that I really enjoy, and actually celebrate, since it centers around the biblical axiom of being thankful. A thankful heart, is truly a happy heart! Have you even known someone whose face is perpetually fixed in a sour-pickle frown, or seems to be always shaking an angry fist at the world? How about those who are riddled with irrational fears of every kind? I would be willing to bet money that they are very unthankful, and ungrateful people. Dear reader, if you happen to be one of these sad souls, or even if you find yourself every now and then slipping into these temporary sourpuss moods, then please allow me inform you of the thrifty and goodly remedy - - it is thankfulness! Yes, I said, "thankfulness." Even so, what a person is thankful for can reveal what kind of person they really are. Like the evil Pharisee who went to Temple, thankful that he wasn't a hated Gentile, or that he wasn't like that Publican next to him who was sincerely and visibly distraught over his sins, it is safe to say that Jesus wasn't very impressed with the Pharisee's brand of self-righteous "thankfulness."
I can go on and on, but for your sake I won't, my point is dear reader, that we all experience good and bad times in our life, more of one than the other, for some people. As bad or as good as we think our life's situation may be, there is always someone worse, or better off then we are - that is the sober truth. Regardless, if we manage to maintain a genuinely thankful and grateful heart, no matter in what circumstances we find ourselves, then we will be able to whether the storms of life with a much better outlook, and come out of them the better for it. The good news is that gratefulness is not exclusive to sex, creed, nationality, or color, but it is available to all humanity. As this year wanes and starts anew, it my hope for you, that you cultivate and maintain a thankful heart, unto the Lord ( I hope) for another blessed year, and for the one to come. I hope you and yours enjoyed a special time of feasting and fellowship, and most of all with a heart full of thankfulness! Ahh..... autumn! It's truly one of my favorite times of the year. It is a glorious time when the long scorching days of summer slowly yield to the reprieving crispness of chilly nights that linger; there is just something about autumn that brings me a sense of joy. Autumn in many parts of the world, signals a final push to bring in late harvests of apples, corn, cranberries, grapes, nuts, olives, pears and pomegranates, before the freezing somber grey skies of winter lays its blankets of stark white snow upon the northern hemisphere. Maybe I love autumn thanks to its cooler days, of which makes it the welcome herald of what I like to refer to as: baking season! Just by looking at this beautiful photo, for me, it visually captures a stunning display of autumn's splendor, but it also serves to remind me that there is a severe lack of this sort of outdoor autumnal grandeur in my neck of the woods. Yes, autumn may be in full swing according to my calendar, but not in appearance. Outside my window, all I see is Southern California's dismal excuse for an autumnal show case. We go from lush greenery to sickly yellowish brown around here. I truly miss this leafy visual cue signalling autumn's fiery presence that I experienced as a young girl growing up in the great states of Washington, Oregon, and Texas. But SoCal's lack luster fall season would be considered by many, to be an acceptable and minor sacrifice in order to avoid the cold snowy winters experienced by the northern parts of our nation, most of which happen to enjoy glorious fall colored foliage. As a veteran of many long and cold snowy northern winters, I whole heartily embrace the reality that snow is much nicer to visit, than to live in. Even so, it would be nice to walk outside my cozy abode and be greeted with a cheery wave of autumn colored leaves from our 1950's suburban neighborhood canopy, albeit as sparse as it has become, due to our trees reaching their silver maple quinquagenarian life span. All this pondering brings me to the conclusion that I must accept the fact that one of my favorite times of the year will come and go without much ado in the outdoor visual display department. Yes, I can still enjoy the chilly nip of the dawn, and the crisp evening air scented by smokey wisps from the hearth's warm glow. However, even though the trees of So. Cal don't display the fall color I crave; that doesn't mean my oven can't crank out a vivid display of pigmented autumnal splendor as well as the delicious homey scents they provide. Let's see, there's the fiery crimson of red velvet cake, and rich ruby red of cranberries bejeweling quick breads to behold. Moving down the autumn color spectrum we have a full range of ochers displayed on the lighter side with juicy apple crisps sprinkled with cinnamon, and moving down to the deeper orangey range of rich, creamy pumpkin pies. Oh and then there's the light and sunny yellow sweetness of cornbread. The bright chartreuse of pistachio biscotti can be further enhanced with the inclusion of chocolate chips and even a sprinkling of ruby red cranberries. And let's not forget the tawny loaves of bread that perfume the cool air with their earthy and yeasty scent and the deep rich brown hues of chocolate scones. All of these and many more gloriously colored and scented baked goods, help make autumn a glorious time of the year for me, even without a dazzling leafy fall finale. So here's to autumn's colorful splendor that comes not only from nature, but also from the oven! And here is my favorite recipe for sweet golden cornbread, which I got from the side of Alber's cornmeal box. Why not crank up the oven and bake up a pan of down home goodness to share with those you love in celebration of this glorious time of year? Sweet Golden Corn Bread Dry ingredients: 1 1/2 c. all purpose flour 1/2 c. yellow corn meal 2/3 c. sugar 1 Tbsp. baking powder 1/2 tsp. salt Sift together and set aside. Wet ingredients: 1 1/4 c. milk 2 eggs 1/3 c. oil 3 Tbsp. melted butter whisk until eggs are well mixed Preheat oven to 350 F and place oven rack in center of oven. If you are making muffins, then place one rack at the upper third and the other at the middle position of oven. Add wet ingredients into the dry and mix with a whisk just until combined, do not over mix. If you prefer less sugar, the reduce to 1/2 c. but no lower than 1/3 c. Pour mixture into well greased 9" cast iron skillet, muffin tins, 5" x 9" loaf pan, or an 8" square baking pan. Bake at 350F until it springs back to the touch, or until an inserted cake tester comes out with moist crumbs, rotating pan half way through baking. Do not over bake! If you are making a double batch of this recipe, or muffins, then midway through baking, switch pans positions in the oven (upper rack to middle, and middle to upper), and rotate pans a half turn to ensure even baking. Baking times will vary with type of baking pan used and your oven's quirks: cast iron skillet - about 25 to 30 minutes muffin tins - 15 to 20 minutes loaf pan - 35 to 45 minutes 8" square pan - 30 to 35 minutes Baker's notes: Cast Iron: Be sure to remove any remaining slices of corn bread from a cast iron pan, as the cast iron will discolor and impart an iron taste to the corn bread. Muffins: Preheat your oven to 325F and then crank it up to 350F when you put the pans into the oven, this technique will help achieve that desired dome effect. Last night as I stood melting in front of the crucible of my culinary foundry, then it dawned on me - why in the #$%@ (h-e- double tooth pick) am I cooking?! Sorry for the swearing dear reader, but this sort of harsh language seems to rise in accordance with the thermometer. Yes dear reader, with sweat pouring down my body, I began to question my sanity as to why I even cranked up my oven last night at all, amidst three digit temperatures, this is just madness -- madness I tell you! It is said, "If you can't take the heat, then stay out of the kitchen!", and so I ran for cover into the family room where it was much cooler thanks to our little free standing rolling air-conditioning unit that I have dubbed "R2- D2." As I swooned there, waiting for the nausea to subside, my husband came into the room from the hallway and asked me if I was okay. I nodded, as he approached and then he was about to open the door to hell. Me - "Don't go in there." Him - "Why?" Me - "Because it's hot in there. Don't do it." I sternly warned. "I don't even want to go back in there." He turned around and walked back to our air conditioned bed room. Standing in front of the chilly air blowing from R2-D2, I braced myself for the inferno awaiting me. And as I re-entered the blazing hot kitchen to finish dinner, another epicurean quip came to my heat crazed mind, "Welcome to hell!" No doubt, this is a sincerely sinister greeting given by despotic chefs to new cooks around the globe, when they are inducted into professional kitchens. As I wearily slapped down the hot steamy food onto our dining table and I limply sank down hard into my chair with R2-D2 going full throttle, I announced that the stove would be decommissioned until further notice. Well, until the temperatures dipped below 90 degrees, anyhoo. With near heat exhaustion gripping me, I proclaimed that sandwiches would be served for the next few nights, and to my amazement, my family didn't object to my hot food boycott. And so, last night, when the mercury reached a reasonably cooler level, I pulled into the parking lot of our local market where the heat radiated from its sticky black surface, causing me to I walk quickly toward swishing doors that promised soothing cool relief. Once inside the bastion of cool, I slowly meandered the refrigerated aisles reveling in some air-conditioned "me" time, and I blissfully placed cold cuts, fresh fruit, and bread into my cart. Finally, I pulled into line and was about to unload my cold cuts onto the conveyor belt, when I realized I had almost forgotten to purchase the most effective victual weapon against oppressive summer heat, ice cream! I'm sure you'd agree that it is very hard to make ban-berry shakes without ice cream. So, I quickly left my cart holding my spot in line, as I dashed to the ice cream aisle. I made it back in line, paid for my frigid fare, and I hurried home before the ice cream morphed into cream of vanilla soup. As I drove home, I was almost giddy with the idea that I would not have to turn on the stove and cook the next day, maybe even for a week! Sheesh! With so many wonderful cold food recipes to prepare, it made me wonder what took me so !@#$%^* (fricken) long to think of this before? This should have been a no- brainer. I mean come on lady, there's oodles and oodles of cold sandwiches, and salads, and even cold soups galore to consume during long hot summers, so get with the program. And that's exactly what I intend to do - finally! Sure, this common sense epiphany came to me late in the season, but better late than never! Bon Appetite! My eldest son came over to me this evening snickering, and showed me this picture that was on his phone, I read it carefully from top to bottom and then I laughed heartily, so I had to share it with y'all. For those of you who don't get it, I will give you the cliff notes of a story recorded in the New Testament gospels where Jesus and his disciples were invited to a wedding feast in Cana, a town in Galilee [Israel]. As it turned out, the happy couple had run out of wine, but the feast was not yet over, a very bad thing to happen in those ancient days. So Jesus told some waiters to fill a few very large pottery jars to the brim with water, and then he told them to draw it out again and serve it to the master of the banquet. Can you imagine? What would you have done if you were in their sandals? Anyway, they did what Jesus told them to do ( a wise thing to do), and when the master of the banquet tasted it, he raved about the excellent wine that the couple saved until the end of the wedding. Apparently, most people served the good stuff first, and then brought out the bad stuff. This was Jesus' first miracle recorded in Scripture, when he had turned water into wine! That is why this picture is so funny - ha ha ha - "Jesus was here", get it? I'm still snickering ; } Yesterday was not a good baking day, because it yielded one sticky mess after another. First, it was the lemon bars -- I have a confession to make -- I hate making lemon bars. You may be wondering why in the world would I intentionally make something I loath creating in the first place? Well, these lemony travesties were not for me, they were going to a caterer client of my sister [my sister owns a specialty cake business]. The question remains: Why so much malice for this sunny sweet-tart confection? Well, I have very good reasons for loathing this confection, for one thing lemon bars are notorious for leaking their lemony goodness over the sides of their crusty boarders once they are cut -- well --that is if you can cut them out of the pan after using parchment paper, and copious amounts of non-stick spray. And that is exactly what happened to me. Well, initially, and admittedly, I forgot to employ the standard non-stick measures on two pans, after trying to remove them from the pan, that is when I realized my armature faux paz. Fortunately for me, my sister expertly salvaged some of the sticky mess I had made - kudos to her. Not to be out done, I used the standard non-stick measures on the now necessary third pan, but to no avail, meaning, they still stuck to the pan, talk about frustrating! Now we were both greatly annoyed. Just look at this tantalizing picture of lemon bars, it is so deceptively alluring. There they sit on that pretty sparkling cake stand ...mocking me. They look so nice and neat, no ooze to be seen, and they are perfectly dusted with powdered sugar - it is infuriating! Why? Because most recipes don't yield this picturesque result, especially the pristine look of the powdered sugar. In order to maintain that fresh snowy appearance, you have to use a special dusting sugar that doesn't melt into the magma-like lemon filling, and that seems so unnatural to me. I mean, everyone knows that powdered sugar melts into baked goods eventually, so what makes this stuff melt proof? I'm sure - no - I suspect, that this sweet white powder is derived from some sort of by-product from a chemical manufacturing plant, but I could be wrong - maybe. The next sticky mess I created yesterday was while making the brownie bites, and I feel compelled to admit once more--I hate making brownie bites too, well all brownies really. However, I do LOVE eating them, well, that is when I can find a brownie that is in fact chewy. For some reason, making brownies, good brownies, is out of my culinary reach. I either over bake them to the point of being too crunchy and dry, or I under bake them into a gooey mess that can only be served by scooping them out of the pan with a spoon, rather than being cut with knife into neat bite sized shapes. Adding to my frustration, I can't seem to find a recipe that actually yields the desired amount of chew that I prefer. Most of the recipes that boast any sort of chewiness are, more often than not, either too "cakey", or they are too "fudgey" for my taste. I would rather bake my double chocolate chip cookies any day of the week and twice on Sunday, rather than struggle with a super sticky brownie batter spooned into heavily sprayed mini-muffin tins. All that work, only to have them weld to the non-stick pan, that was heavily sprayed with non-stick coating (that point can't be stressed enough), which then causes you to forcibly cut them out, a process that leaves much of their chocolaty carcasses in the pan, rather than neatly plopping them out fully intact- oh the horror! There Is A Solution...I don't like to complain just for the sake of complaining, really I don't. Instead, I prefer to find solutions to the problems I encounter on a daily basis; and the solution to the sticky situation I endured, as I see it, is to not make these confectionery travesties in the first place, but rather to bake their superior counter parts, namely lemon tartlets, and double chocolate cookies! Just consider the possibilities, they are endless, not to mention less sticky -- well -- depending on your execution techniques. Lemon Bars vs. Lemon TartletsNot only are lemon tartlets self contained, meaning they don't require any cutting, and that means no lemony filling oozing out of place, but they are also darn cute ta boot. Observe in the pictures below, how the buttery shortbread crusts beautifully and neatly keep the sunny filling where it belongs, inside the crust. The cute factor is further enhanced by cutting those little buttery tartlet crusts into various petal shaped edges, or they can be nicely crimped into fluted pans that also give them a lovely visual appeal. These are just a few of the many superior attributes that help raise the bar, and make them a cut above, the traditional lemon bar [puns intended]. To add to the tartlets growing list of positives, instead of a dusting them with the suspected chemically altered powdered sugar, once out of their metal confinement, tartlets can then be decorated with all manner of fruits, whipped toppings, zest shavings, or meringues, you are only limited by your imagination! And best of all, because there is no oozing, they can be easily handled and thus easily packaged and consumed! The pastry recipe that I use has enough butter and cream cheese in it to prevent any stick-age, so these little gems easily release from their little metallic nests -- no scraping required, no swearing, and no sticky oozing mess, just lemony loveliness. Brownie Bites vs. Chocolate CookiesAnd the same goes for the dreary and insipid brownie bite. Instead of making a potentially aggravating confection, why not make an uncomplicated double chocolate cookie? Cookies can be neatly scooped onto baking sheets that are simply clad with parchment paper, or a Silpat. The resulting cookie practically and effortlessly removes itself from the pan. The cookies can then be fashioned into sandwich cookies, that are neatly smeared or decoratively piped with a myriad of fillings, and they can even be topped with an endless array of flavored and colored glazes - resulting in a confection that is both stunning to behold, and is neat to eat. Yes that's right, by kicking brownie bites to the culinary curb, you can retire your scalpel, because it won't be needed any longer to surgically remove the infuriatingly sticky brownie bites that mindbogglingly super-glued themselves to non-stick pans coated with non-stick cooking spray! Okay, sure, you could dress up a brownie bite the same way you can do with any tartlet, provided you can actually remove the brownie bite from the pan without destroying it in the process, ever try to decorate a pile of crumbs? Hmm ... come to think of it, I suppose that is how the invention of the brownie ball was birthed, out of necessity to reverse brownie bite failure. Yet another sticky situation...To make the rather sticky day I spent at my sister's shop complete, it followed me home, and manifested its tentacles once more as I fixed my hungry husband a simple burger. As I put the well formed patty into the hot cast iron skillet, what do you suppose happened when I went to expertly flip it? Yes, that's right, it was stuck! "Ohhh...not again!", I whined to myself. And so dear reader, I had to persuade the burger to release the hellacious protein weld it had formed with the cast iron pan by using my thin spatula as a scalpel. Honestly! Why did it do that? That pan was hot when I put it in, and there was enough grease in the pan to start my own green fuel processing plant. Why is it that on some days a particularly annoying theme seems to follow you around? Well, thankfully that was the last of my sticky situations for the day, which I had to share with my sister via a greasy fingered text message. And it was her cleaver reply to my final lament that inspired the title of this blog entry. And upon reflection, the day was not a total loss in that it caused me to make a quality decision: I will never...ever... ever... make another lemon bar, or brownie bite as long as I live! As for hamburgers, well, I'm not prepared to give up making them just because the odd one sticks to the pan now and then, because this occurrence is far more rare than the expected and reliable sticky agony awaiting me regarding lemon bars and brownie bites. Honest - - never again will I make these sticky sweets, never again.
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Hello!Welcome to my blog, dear reader. My name is Heather, and I am a full time housewife and mom living in Whittier Ca. with my wonderful husband of 26 years, and our two sons. I welcome you and hope you enjoy reading what is on my mind. Subscribe to
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